when the music's over turn out the lights
And one day she noticed her mind that belonged to no one--- not to her, not to God, not to some mystical force called Consciousness or Awareness or some magical sounding foreign word--- that "mind," which was something she had been told was there but had never found, well, it wandered away. And the body they called by a name to mean that wispy ghost of a girl seemed to get up and walk slowly out the door, even though up on stage some man was pontificating, though he kept saying no one was talking. And in another room that she walked out of, another man in a robe was saying you have to want the truth but had never explained exactly what that thing he called truth could be. And as she walked out, people seemed annoyed--- even if they were supposed to be in some sublime state above annoyance or know that their annoyance was simply happening to no one at all.
The girl walked outside and the birds started singing--- well, no doubt they had been singing, but how could she know? To her the world was born anew every time some apparent perception appeared, and she no longer seemed very interested in the stories she had learned at school about how and why perception occurred or the stories told by the men on their stages who seemed to profess knowledge about no thing at all.
She walked farther and farther away, until her thoughts seemed to fall out of her head and all that apparent knowledge and information and understanding of what was never there to understand in the first place tumbled into the dust and gathered grass and rocks and clumps of soil and rolled and rolled and rolled down the hill until that ball of empty wisdom splashed into the vast lake along with whatever seemed to be left of the girl.
From the bottom of the lake, the sea monster murmured, tired of being hit by the vacuous pretentious thoughts of human beings. And the lake swelled, and gentle waves caressed the shore until darkness fell and neither the girl nor the surface of the lake nor any thing at all could be seen for evermore. 💓
❤
ReplyDeleteFeeling this...takes the breath away...'nothing matters' can feel amazingly alone. <3
ReplyDelete